Posted on: July 23rd, 2008 Fake Bands: The Cars
Ahhh, who doesn’t remember The greatest scene in Fast Times At Ridgemont High when Phoebe Cates gets out of the pool, unbuttons her bikini top and whispers “Hi Brad”. Uhh wait, where was I? Oh yeah, of course in the background was “Living In Stereo” the Cars classic gem, from one of the best American new wave bands of the 80’s. Now the cars had 2 singers, the main one being the super freaky looking Ric Ocasek who was about 6’10, weighed around 98 pounds, and somehow managed to bag supermodel Paulina Porizkova as his wife. Man, chicks love rock stars, no matter what they look like. The second singer was Benjamin Orr, who sang one of the best and most successful songs they had “Drive”. After 10 years of great music and crazy ass videos, they called it quits in 1988. They all pursued solo careers and Ocasek moved on to producing bands as well. Unfortunately Benjamin Orr died of Pancreatic Cancer in 2000. So you would think the story was over right? Well, you would be wrong. Hey this is classic rock any kind of horseshit flies.
In 2005, the guitarist and the bongo player decided to get back together with Todd Rundgren, the 70’s singer/songwriter and Meat Loaf producer to form The New Cars. How you call yourself New, when the average age in the band is 90 I don’t know, and how Todd Rundgren fits into the Cars musical style is beyond me. Oh, I know how, he was available, he can almost sing and he also needed to eat. So this travelling car wreck goes on tour with Blondie, playing the usual summer sheds holding between 6-10 thousand seats. They record the tour and release a CD of horse vomit. Surprise surprise, it sells 16,000 copies. I’ve sold more CD’s of me farting into a mike. After the tour with Blondie, the New Cars go out on there own and shocker…find out no one wants to see these losers except for a couple of hundred bigger losers. So we’re giving you fair warning, The New Cars is nothing more than a lemon.
RockHeap has spoken.